Last week, we celebrated Mother’s Day and its heartwarming to see families dining together with their moms and postings on social media celebrations and surprises with their mothers. The sight though made me feel melancholic. It’s been almost a decade now since I lost my only consolation in everything I do in a car accident
When she left which I accepted with a sincere prayer above that she be allowed to watch over us as she enjoys the afterlife, I thought the idea of mama’s absence will eventually sink in as a reality that I must accept. I was wrong. The longer the time passes the stronger the longing and sadness i feel.
Like last Sunday and in several instances before, I feel down and bad each time I see people of my age celebrating or treating their mothers with a vacation or something. I envy them. They have all the time. As for mama, I lost her when life was still a bit messy and I could not afford a dinner outside the house. Now, when everything is in place, the most I can do is buy her grave some flowers. I can’t help but feel sad every now and then.
Who would not feel bad? There’s a lot of celebrations for mothers around and I can only look at them laughing and enjoying with their mothers. At times, I would have my little misadventures and successes. Before, I am more than excited to share it with her and now I can only sigh and look away and comfort myself with and in silence.
One can change a girlfriend and a wife but no one can replace a mother. Perhaps its true. The memories of my mom and the lessons in life that she has shared with me have all stayed and in some instances, a bit literraly. After she left, I have brought her plants and orchids with me. I am now in the process of building them a house of their own at the farm. Each time they bear flowers, I can feel my mother smiling.
I miss my mother and she’s gone forever. Life is indeed different without the blabbering mouth every morning. Celebrating my little adventures are no longer the same without her. I know the feeling is forever no matter how I try to accept it and move forward. To you reading this, love your mother and make her feel like the only queen. One day she will leave you, trust me, life will never be the same again.